This just made me happy

This just made me happy

Got this in a roundabout way from Ancrene Wiseass:



More blogging soon, as I'm hoping for decent news in the next week or so, and am currently in grading jail. And still looking for a March Carnivalesque host!!

My life at the mo'

my life at the mo'

Right now, my favourite phrase can rhymed with "clucking bell." My very favourite phrase can be abbreviated, "FFS". Some people. I ask you.

In need of SCUBA gear, good chocolate and Laphroaig or sim.

In need of SCUBA gear, good chocolate and Laphroaig or sim.

• SCUBA gear because I am buried alive under a never-ending pile of OMG too much frakkin', gorram work and administrative bullshit and colleagues who make me feel like I'm Mary-Sue-ing the "groundhog day" episode of Xena: Warrior Princess that LDW showed me when I was visiting him in fabulous European Capital, and large cat. X, having read about my fear of being buried alive ("I'm not dead yet!"), suggested I be buried in a cardboard box with an oxygen tank, just in case...
  
• good chocolate because of the endorphins
  
• Laphroig or sim.? Need you ask?

Also ...

Host needed for the next A/M Carnivalesque ... SQ? Tenth C? Magistra?

A small pet peeve

A small pet peeve

I used to think it was SLAC -- the academic calendar is often hard to find, and we're lucky if it's set 6 months in advance. SLAC drives me crazy with its tendency for last-minute planning -- rooms not assigned until the week before classes start, finals schedules that make no sense, especially when there are often grades due before finals are given ...

I just looked at LDW's schedule, though -- or tried to. He teaches at a reasonably prestigious uni. There's no academic calendar at all. They've gone to a monthly calendar, and there are no dates set for the beginning of the fall semester. I'm annoyed, because long-distance relationships are hard enough. But I know that both SLAC and Prestigious Uni are enrolling more and more non-traditional (e.g., working) students. They are also both trying to deal with enrollment problems, in that they are chasing enrollments. I was a working student for much of my academic life. I never had to pay tuition and fees, but I had to live (the grad fellowship was not enough to live on, partially because Grad U housing cost half of my stipend ...).

Attention, you silly institutions! When you are trying to attract and cater to a non-traditional demographic, it isn't *just* about offering evening classes. Working people need to be able to plan their work schedules (and sometimes, babysitting schedules) so that they can both keep their jobs and do well in their courses. They need to know the exam schedules well in advance, because the kinds of jobs students usually hold are not particularly flexible. And if that helps poor faculty fools whose relationships stretch over time zones and miles, that's not a bad thing, either.

warm and fuzzy, as they say

warm and fuzzy, as they say

My classes were good today. Students had fun. I told them one of the Latin Fathers also made me feel like my head would 'splode, and they laughed. One took pictures of a theological diagram I drew on the board. Two of my colleagues whom I respect a lot and who are well-respected across campus gave me compliments. And most of the students had done most of the reading. Doesn't get much better.

World History Question

World History Question

Or maybe one for the Americanists? I'm teaching about the Columbian exchange this week . One of the required readings makes a point that part of the problems Europeans had in dealing with the New World and Native Americans is that they didn't know how to fit the Native Americans into a world view based on the biblical creation. These difficulties contributed to an ongoing discussion about the humanity of the Native Americans, including church councils (Salamanca, IIRC) that defined whether or not they had souls, etc. Part of the reason for this was also because, at least for the Spanish, being human and capable of salvation meant that the Native Americans should be protected from being enslaved.

Makes sense to me. More or less (I'm condensing about 35 pp. into a paragraph here).

Here's where I'm stuck -- if humanity is one of the reasons that one should be protected from slavery, what was the justification for bringing African slaves to the New World? Because if one sticks to the biblical accounts and extrapolations therefrom, Africans were the descendants of Ham, the son of Noah. So they'd definitely be human. Europeans would have known that some Africans were Muslims, so capable of religious belief, even if, to Christians, it was the wrong belief. So ... ??

I am not looking for answers that say anything simplistic like, "well, Europeans were trying to justify their racism to get rich." That's not my point. What I'm wondering is if anyone knows how Europeans justified this differentiation in treatment of Africans, who were more or less 'known' peoples, and Native Americans, who were 'new'. What were the rationales, if any?

Teaching Question

Teaching Question

For the first time, I am teaching an upper-division course in my area of expertise. I am really not happy with it. I let myself let the reading assignments define the pace of the class, and the course is consequently moving too slowly. I'm using Innes' new book from Routledge, and it has some great qualities, but I am realising it just isn't balanced enough. It's a Rome and Barbarians book masquerading as a coherent text.

So I am feeling like I need to add more lectures and pick up the pace. But I don't want the students to feel too burdened (they aren't reading what I would call a lot, but it's not a light load, either.)

So, denizens of the blogosphere -- what happens when you realise you need to re-vamp a course that isn't quite working? Do you just leave it and re-vamp the next time? or do you hope for student patience and rearrange during the semester? How do you do it without looking like an idiot? Give me the benefit of your wisdom, bitte?

Note: the students know this is a new course, and I have already re-structured one thing, having given them input on it. I also do try to do regular checks on what is and isn't working, and why, because they seem to value having some input.

Survivor guilt?

Survivor Guilt?

So say you have to compete for funding for conferences. You know your friends compete with you. You get most of the funding you ask for. Do you mention this when people are talking? Do you hide it?

I ask because I have been very fortunate with funding -- maybe. Last year, I got funding for one conference where I didn't present (but a major conference in my field), and one where I presented twice. This year, they found money for me to go to one conference where I'm presenting and chairing a different panel, and a prestigious conference where I'm giving a paper. Next year, I'm putting in for two conferences and a subvention. I will probably get 2 out of three. That is more than most folks get (i think).

But ... I am giving papers and presentations. I'm negotiating a contract for a publication that I may have to get out the door this summer. I'm behind on a couple of things, but I've also submitted one essay for publication and have the beginnings of a second book-length project. I am on an accelerated contract (and who knows, this may dry up after I go up for T&P). I taught an overload last semester and am teaching a summer course to pay for a research trip this summer. Last summer, I graded AP exams to offset research costs. I'm not as productive as I'd like, but I'm carrying my department's enrollments (next is someone who teaches about 20% fewer students), have the most advisees, and as much or more committee work as anyone else (again, the service falls on the departmental women). I know that there are good reasons I get the support I get that have nothing to do with being my likeable self.

So why do I feel guilty about the support? Why do I feel I have to hide it from my friends and even my departmental colleagues? Well, apart from the fact that sometimes the reaction is, "well, I wish I had time to do all that!" I don't have time. I'm juggling like a crazy person. I'm just not willing to give up something I've been working for for so long.

Massive Congratulations!!!

Massive Congratulations!!!

Everybody!!!! My academic sibling, one of my oldest friends, the Cranky Professor, has just been informed that he has joined the ranks of the tenured professoriate!!!

I am so very happy for him. He deserves it. Feel free to pass the word around the medieval blogosphere, too! I am initiating a virtual congratulations party as of now!!

East Asian Medievalists

East Asian Medievalists

Are any of you regular readers who comment here also East Asian (especially Japanese) medievalists? Or, do any of you regulars (i.e., people I feel I kind of know, because you read and comment here) know any? I have an idea. Please free to e-mail me at my personal addy if you know it, or my ADM addy if you don't. Also, MG, you might be part of it. Be afraid. Be very afraid. ;-)

And more on Sartorial splendour

And more on sartorial splendour

This has been yet another week of busy, so I've missed some good blogging. Today I was at New Kid's, and found a typically sensible and strong essay, this time on the latest Thomas Hart Benton essay in the CHE. In it, Benton talks about the effects of dressing less casually (or as he thinks of it, more formally) on his interactions with students. New Kid responds to part of his essay with a:

Well, DUH! And I also wanted to say, Any woman professor could have told you that. Well, okay, maybe almost any is more accurate. Because while I know there are lots of women out there who teach (brilliantly and successfully) in very casual clothes, I have also had the same conversation with lots and lots of women faculty - the conversation in which we agree that in order to project a certain authority in the classroom, we dress formally for teaching.*

And those of us who feel this way have reached this conclusion long before our first post-tenure year.

Because we've HAD to figure it out - because students respond very differently to men and women teachers.

New Kid rightly points out the gender issues of professional dress, and the comment thread is packed with good and thoughtful points on gender, dress, and authority in the classroom. I realised I had such a lot to say about these things -- not particularly in the most organised way, because really, I need to drag my ass to the gym and get a ton of work done today. So apologies for the lack of careful crafting.

I teach on a campus where there are no real dress standards. I like that. I'd like to think it doesn't really make a difference what I wear, but you know, it does. Our undergraduate population comes largely from a demographic where the only people who go by 'Dr' are men. Pretty much every freshman male automatically calls female faculty 'Miss' or 'Mrs.' (hardly ever that nasty feminist 'Ms'), and the male faculty 'Dr' or 'Professor'. Why yes, this is one of the first teaching moments in any of my classes! Of course, the fact that the most influential people on our coaching staff continually refer to us (especially women faculty who don't seem to understand that we need to support our athletes by letting them slide) by our social titles doesn't help. I have to say, I find it pretty amusing that a couple of my colleagues (male and female) have received nasty emails from these folks addressed to 'Mr' or 'Mrs', yet signed, 'Coach' or 'X, Athletic Director'.

I know, I've moved quickly from student perceptions to peer perceptions. The thing is, for me, I know I can get away with teaching in jeans, if I really want to. That is, I can walk into a classroom and teach in jeans, and my authority is not all that diminished. I'm questionably fortunate in that my students frequently find me intimidating. One brand new student actually told me s/he needed to speak to me because s/he loved my class but also dreaded having to show up and participate in class discussions run by a particular barbarian chieftain who showed up in Rome in 451. I've had colleagues tell me I'm intimidating, too -- especially male colleagues. I've been accused (or complimented) for 'communicating like a man' and 'having big brass ones'. Whatever it is, and really, I think what people find intimidating is that I question them. I ask students to defend their assertions, and expect them to be able to back up what they say. And, like any good bull terrier (which I've just realised I may physically resemble in shape of nose -- if I were using bird allusions, it really would be aquiline -- and constant smile, even when going for the throat), I tend not to drop a subject in class until I've got my point across. Ok, I sometimes do go off on wild tangents, but I always come back. So maybe a bull terrier with some Golden Retriever or Irish Setter. What do I know? I'm a cat person. So ... I can maintain my classroom authority in blue jeans.

But ... I hardly ever wear jeans of any colour in the classroom. I have some nice cords that I'll wear with nice pullovers or jackets, and I don't wear suits, because that's not our campus culture -- at least not in our College. But I try to look grown up, professional, and put-together. I take myself more seriously when I show up looking tidy and with my hair and face done, and so do my students. With them, it balances the fact that I run a very relaxed classroom. It also makes it easier to enforce my 'no pajamas and slippers in class' rule. But you know, as I read New Kid's essay, I realised that my dress issues are really less about my students than they are about my peers, and far, far less about my peers in the College than they are about my peers in the professional Schools, administrators, and middle-management types. Those are the places where image is most important.

My College at SLAC is, and has been, the poor stepchild for almost its whole existence. We are seen as serving the needs of the Schools, by providing the core curriculum so that their students can go on to earn Degrees That Mean Something. To be fair, there has been a push to change that for about 10 years, but the fact that College faculty do the vast majority of teaching in terms of both personal loads (4-4 or 4-3, as opposed to 3-2 or 2-2) and the range and number of courses taught. Since I joined SLAC, publication requirements have been added, because our brethren (there are few sistren) in the Schools believe that we must raise our scholarly profile. The faculty of the Schools wear suits and ties. Casual dress for them is neatly pressed khakis, button-down shirts, and ties. They polish their shoes. I now sit on a couple of campus-wide committees. Meetings often fall on my non-teaching days. The guys in facilities have mentioned that they know when I'm teaching by what I'm wearing. They call me by my first name (as they do most of the College faculty they like), and they treat some of us as equals in a 'we're all here together to make this place work' way -- which I think is how it should be. This semester, they aren't so sure. Why? Because I'm dressing for my peers.

I mentioned that I'm on a couple campus-wide committees, right? I'm the only College rep, and often the only woman. I'm frequently the junior person (in rank, not age -- or I'd be really screwed). And I am frequently ignored. Despite the fact that I am on one committee precisely because I have more expertise in the business side of something we are dealing with, and as much or more expertise in the academic side, my contributions are (usually) politely listened to, and then dismissed. Part of this is the top-down nature of SLAC, I think, but it has only recently occurred to me that I am loaded with perceived disadvantages. I know -- it took me a year to figure this out? D'uh! I also have a feeling that I'm on these committees because of the bull terrier thing. Superdean, who has his own bull mastiff (or possibly bull in a china shop) qualities, trusts me not to do what lots of my College peers do in the same situation, i.e., just give up and stop going to the meetings. Me? I guess I'll be pulling out my old industry clothes and dressing like people in the Schools. I don't know how much it will help, but hey, I'm thinking that in this case, clothes are a medium, and the medium is the message.

Carnivalesque 35

Carnivalesque 35

Hello, readers -- Carnivalesque 35 is now up at Atol is þin unseon. Heavy on the mediæval this time, but it rounds up a lot of posts I missed during the rush of semester's end, and I'm really glad to see them. Have fun, and if you'd like to host one of the next Ancient/Medieval Carnivalesques (March and May), please let Sharon at Early Modern Notes or me know!

Late AHA blogging

Late AHA blogging

Right -- so it's been ages. I can only say that I came home from AHA to prep and moving office, which has been very interesting. That and start of the semester. Serious blogging to re-commence soon, as part of my goal to write something purposeful every day. But for now, I am posting Blogger meet-up pix -- dinner with Pilgrim/Heretic. Sorry about the focus -- I'm still learning to use the new camera and also, I need new glasses.

P/H, her LWI, and I went to a place for dinner where we could order lots of small things and share. Here's what we had. Apologies for not cutting -- I can't remember the code at the moment.


Out of focus, but this is a lovely field greens salad big enough for three. Very nice vinaigrette -- just simple and tasty.


Pizza Margherita -- close to perfect, I thought.


A Quail! on Polenta! with lovely little olives!


One of the many good things about blogger dinners is finding you and your friends have similar tastes. The menu offered several sardine preparations, and we were all of one mind that they needed to be included. We chose the most simple variation -- salted sardines with butter and lovely bread.



My personal favourite: duck and rabbit rillettes. Very rich, and delicately seasoned. yum!

Add wine/beer, and it was very nice. But really, as wonderful as the food was, it ws nothing compared to the company. If ever I find myself regretting blogging, I will be able to argue that it has done me far more good than ill. Through this blog, I have made friends who I know will be RL friends for life. How cool is that?

Blogging the AHA

Blogging the AHA

Let's see -- the AHA. I never got to any of the professional panels, because there was too much going on! Yes, there was a whole lotta medieval. Seriously -- On Thursday, not so much on Friday, and again on Saturday and Sunday. Not just Medieval, but Early Medieval cleverly slipped in under the radar (because no one wants to hear that stuff). Plus blogger meetups and plans for a Kazoo panel!

So here's the short (for me) version of my AHA this year (and can I say how much better AHA is when not on either side of the interview table? Still, the only reason I can think of to go is to see non-medieval folk, because there's something about it ...more on that later).

Day One: The student who accompanied me really wanted to go to the first panel. I'm glad s/he did. Ran into Extremely Cool Colleague from Jesuit U while registering. Yay! Then a very decent panel, especially the papers on portents and forgeries. I was less enthused about the comment, because post-Postmodernism is only slightly more interesting to me than Postmodernism. I think it's because I'm not really convinced that our approaches to texts is legitimized by Postmodern theory -- perhaps more in the eyes of lit people, but ...?? Then, I think you all know by now that I tend to use whatever approach works, and feel no need to worry about how things get into my toolbox, as long as the tools are there. Jargon aside, I really didn't agree with some of the comment anyway, because I thought there was too much lumping of Classical sources with Late Antique, and sometimes I think they have to be considered separately.

Day Two: Due to a nosebleed, I only made it to part of the first panel -- outside my normal choices, but on a subject that does hold my interest, plus a friend was presenting. Made it to her paper, and joined into lively discussion, then went to an overpriced lunch with nice people. After, met up with the student to go to the book room -- to which s/he had already gone. So we went to a panel of the student's choice -- on late Medieval Spain. Enjoyed watching the student absorb the fact that Europeanists are expected to speak other languages -- one of the papers was in Spanish, and the question and answer session was bilingual. Still, the papers I understood (I got about a quarter of the third, but Castilian is hard for me to follow, and I really don't speak Spanish properly anyway) were pretty good, especially -- and this is hard to admit! -- the one on customs (the tax sort) after the unification. Even better, I ran into Pilgrim/Heretic on the way in, and we firmed up our plans for meeting for dinner.

Dinner was fantastic! We went to one of my favourite places in DC (thanks to Tiruncula for the idea!) -- Two Amys. Food pix to follow. Let's just say it was affordable and very tasty. Plus I met the famous LWI, who is one of the most charming people I have ever met.

Day Three: Blogger meetup was me and Belle. Apologies from many, who had either overslept or had interviews. Still, that was fun. Then off to the first Medieval Social Justice panel. All the papers were good, although really, they needed to be seen in the context of the second panel as well. The second paper was the one I appreciated most in terms of my own work, as it dealt with law and showed very convincingly, I thought, that there was a good deal of unease in the Carolingian period over the extents to which the judicial system seemed at the mercy of political tides. The third paper, on hostages, led to a really interesting discussion about what hostage-taking even means. This paper and the first fit best into the purpose of the session, which was looking at the MA in terms of approaching social justice issues now.

The aims of the panels became much clearer in the second session, where we were given not one, but two calls to action -- to speak out against social injustice. Or at least, the aims of some of the panelists. The paper on marriage equity was, I thought, fantastic, and it and the very first paper, on prisons, made me think an awful lot about the role of faculty in exploring ideas of social justice. They also -- and this is true of most of the papers that explicitly addressed social justice issues -- made me more convinced that we really do have to keep our roles separate. I think, and I said this, that there is a huge difference between introducing certain themes, and arguing whether they are right or wrong. This is especially true when dealing with the MA -- and honestly, I think that we do our subjects an injustice when we try to make the past too relevant. Yes, some of the same, or similar, issues were important to them as to us. BUT -- I think it shortchanges the importance we must place on context if we try to draw too many parallels. I think this is why I appreciated the approaches in the hostage, prisons, and marriage papers the most (in terms of raising issues). Yes, in at least two of them, there were implicit parallels being drawn; but they remained on the side where the parallels were used to explore the questions, and how they were conceived in the MA. They were good reminders that these were not new issues, and that there have been different, and sometimes better, arguments made around those issues in the past. Yet they remained separate: the audience could make the connections, but in a way that raised questions, not that supplied answers.

One of the more eminent audience members contributed fairly eloquent responses to the issue -- although it was noted that he himself has spoken up on social and political issues. Moreover, it was noted many times that, for many of us, being historians does inform our world views and often helps to hone our arguments when it comes to social and political issues. But whether it shapes our ideas of social justice, or whether we should in turn use our positions as academics to legitimize our ideas of what are essentially issues of right and wrong is a different matter. Happily, the sessions proved especially beneficial in raising those questions -- what are our rights and responsibilities? Where do we draw the line between scholarship and politics? They were indeed 'thinking' sessions, and were worth the price of admission.

After that, lunch. Then back to roam around, unsuccessfully try to catch up with old friends, unexpectedly meet up with Ralph Luker and Sepoy and another friend for coffee, run through the book room (which I found far too overwhelming) and then to meet the student for a reception. The reception was fun, but I didn't eat enough, and then was unable to meet with some folks for dinner, so ended up going to another reception, then running into Sepoy and some of his colleagues in the lobby, where they kindly included me in their group and we sat and talked for a very long while. Should have eaten more! But I think I have a good idea for a session for Kalamazoo in 2009, which is always a good thing.

Day Four: Ugh. Far too tired, so met Pilgrim and LWI for breakfast, then went off to the last session -- Really good. All Carolingian! All the time! Stuff I could ask questions about AND comment on without feeling an idiot! And I'm chairing a panel with two of the panelists in May, so that's a good thing. Plus, I got to meet somebody else I'd wanted to meet for a long time, and had a very helpful talk on sources, my current project, and other such things. Had to leave before lunch, but still was happy to have been there. Got home hours and hours later, fed cats, collapsed.

How was your holiday conference?

AHA Meet-up

AHA Meet-up (eta: Saturday Morning)

In an attempt to accommodate flow, variable traffic, and lots of running in and out, we're going for the cafe option, which always works well at the Kazoo meet-ups. Through the kindness of a bloggy friend who knows the territory far better than I, a venue has been chosen:

Cafe International, 2633 Connecticut Ave, just across Connecticut from the Woodley Park metro entrance. The map in the AHA Program should suffice to get you there.

It opens at 7:00 a.m., and that's when we'll meet (early birds willing to help stake out seats are welcome!). I'll be leaving in time to get to session 96 at the Marriott at 9, but obviously people can hang out as long as they want!

ETA: Feel free to pass the message. As usual, anonymity and pseudonymity to be respected as necessary!

More on the AHA

More on the AHA

Info on meet-up (Saturday am around 7) to follow. But how is it that pretty much every interesting professional panel is across from one of the very few medieval panels? Again, I'm having to choose between things that could be really useful in terms of teaching and SLAC's focus on being a 'teaching school' and Stuff That I Never Get to Hear in My Own Field, Not to Mention People With Whom I Should Stay In Contact.

Aargh. But, since I am taking 4 undergrads with me, I can send them off to Tony Grafton's Saturday morning panel (one of the really interesting TG ones across from the medieval stuff), and maybe send the two who are getting their secondary ed credentials to one of the others that looks useful. Yay for minions mentoring. I'm really looking forward to that part. I took my two favourite and most promising community college students to AHA a few years back, and we all had a blast going through the program and picking sessions (and them elbowing me when I started to doze in one session), and coming back and reporting on what the others had missed. The 'bring students' lower registration rate is one of the best things AHA has done in ages, I think. The two students I took before both did very good degrees in History, and one is now working on an MA, hoping to move on to a PhD (after she gets her damned languages!); the other did a bunch of study abroad and is now going to med school. This year, my students have broad interests, none in my fields, really, but none of my SLAC colleagues seemed to think taking students was a worthwhile operation. The only thing I regret is that I think I'm having to cough up for this one out of my own pocket ...

So I'll be blogger-breakfasting, going to at least one reception, trying to get to a bunch of the medieval panels -- especially the one on Sunday, and seeing friends, all the while meeting up with the students for updates. Yipes! It's not like I have writing, contract negotiations, and class prep or anything -- but so do you all!

Carnivalesques Galore

Carnivalesques Galore!

Aargh! Somehow I missed a Carnivalesque when I was in grading jail! The December Early Modern version is up at Cardinal Wolsey's place.

The next Ancient/Medieval version will be on or about January 20 at Atol is thine unseon, which is something in Anglo-Saxon, but I have no idea what, since my experience of A/S is pretty close to non-existent! I leave it to you all to tell me. This is one of the first times we've turned the reins over to an undergrad, so imagine the pressure!
Contributions to (ahem) floweringnutcase AT gmail DOT com.

And, of course, if you are interested in hosting, please drop a line.

In other news, the blogger meet-up post is here. I'm leaning towards Saturday, and am checking on coffee shops ...

AHA Blogger Meetup

AHA Blogger Meetup

How does an early Saturday breakfast or Friday at 5-ish sound?

Assessing Assessment

Assessing Assessment

The semester is officially over. All I can see is work piled up from here to the next apocalypse. But tonight I am filled with Chinese food and a little beer, and I'm tired. I've also been percolating some thoughts about this gig at SLAC, now that I've been there for over a year. And I'm thinking about some of the underlying assumptions for assessment and accreditation programs (and yes, for how they fit into the T&P portfolio) and how they leave me cold these days. I've also been thinking about World History again, but that's for another post.

At one point at the beginning of the semester, I thought I'd hit my SLAC groove. It lasted about ten minutes. This semester kicked my butt, and not in that good way that leaves you exhilarated. I taught 13 lecture hours this semester. Two courses were upper-division courses I'd never taught before, and for one of those I had never taken any formal coursework -- I just knew that the students seemed to want something other than had been offered in the course before. I'd have liked some input on the course, because it's a service course. As such, it makes sense to me that the course be fairly consistent no matter who teaches it. Not so much. So I made it up as I went along. Part of the course was on the history of the writing or history, the rest was on the doing of history. I think the best day in the course was when one of the students said s/he thought it was going to be one of those classes where you're not really sure how it all fits together at the time, but you find yourself drawing on in all your other courses. I really hope so. The other course was in a field I know, but the SLAC mentality seemed to have made it hard. Or maybe I just don't know how to teach Upper-division courses effectively yet. What I wanted was to divide the week between topical lectures/discussions and discussions of primary source readings. The topical part kind of went by the wayside when I saw students trying to find what I was talking about in the text. Most of what I was talking about couldn't be looked up. Except for the military history, students didn't really read the primary sources. There was, admittedly, a good bit of reading for SLAC -- all of about 100-200 pp. a week. The surveys should have been easy, but they weren't. Again, there was a problem with preparation. Students just didn't do the reading. They didn't bring notes. Several students turned in only one or two assignments out of four. Much of the time, the students hadn't prepared because they said they didn't understand the language. That is, there were unfamiliar words, and looking them up in a dictionary made no sense.

Well, that's sounding bitter. To be fair, I had some students who really did try hard, and did do all the work. They kept me sane. They also made me feel guilty, because the classes could have been so much better. And in terms of personality, sense of humor, and being a mensch? I'd say probably 75% of the students are just really there. Despite that, though, this is the first time in my teaching life where I really thought, "these people aren't me." Not one of my students showed an interest in being really good, let alone excelling. They all simply seemed to want to be good enough. Good enough means getting a D if it's a non-major class, and a C if it is. Minuses are fine. It's sort of a shock. When I taught community college, I had a lot of grade-grubbers. I had a lot of students who were there to save money and who wanted to transfer into selective universities for their last two years. My classes weren't required, and so only those with an interest took them. Here, I have great enrollment numbers. My classes are not required, but they do fulfill a requirement. And students take classes with me more than once, even when they don't have to. My evals are fine. Students say they like me and that my courses are challenging. But they don't seem to want the A. Or maybe those who do are, like me, so brought down by those who don't care that they've given up.

That was all in aid of getting me to assessment. We're doing lots of assessment things at SLAC. Everybody is, it seems. We review out courses, departments, programs, etc., and re-examine the instruments of assessment. We redefine and refine our outcomes. We are told we must measure not only our students' performance, but our own. How do we measure that? By whether or not our students are successful. We must survey them. We must find standardized tests in our fields to give exiting seniors. We cannot be objective, we are told, so we must let external criteria be our guide.

In principle, I think most of this is fine. I like collaborating and norming with my colleagues, to a point. I like it when I can bounce an idea off a colleague and have him or her tell me I'm being a hard-ass, or unreasonable, or too easy. LDW has served as an external examiner for other universities. I like the idea of having an expert not employed at SLAC looking at what I'm doing and telling me it's in line with what is being taught at other places. After all, there is no one else here who teaches what I teach. How do I know if I'm doing it right? How do I know if I'm letting my standards slip or expecting too much? Sometimes it happens. LDW told me today that he thought the essay question for the Civ final was really hard. Admittedly, he doesn't teach World History, so the idea of a very broad comparison seemed very difficult to him. I had to explain that I was looking for big-picture and not too detailed answers, rather than the kind of deep and detailed essay I'd have wanted in a Western Civ class.

On the other hand ... well, all of the assessment of us as faculty is predicated on the idea that students are here to learn. It's based on the idea that students do learn, and remember. Even though we like to cringe, because so much of assessment and accreditation seems to focus on whether students are getting value for money, it *is* also based on the idea we try to impress upon our students: what we teach is important, and a BA/BA is not just a piece of paper that means a better entry-level job. But what if that's all the students want? What if they aren't so worried about the experience, about savouring and remembering what we try to teach them? What if, as one of my students said to me, they just aren't that into it and really just didn't feel like getting the A they could have got, because all they needed to graduate was 70%? For most of my students at SLAC, that seems to be the rule. Going to SLAC is kind of like buying a Louis Vuitton purse: you pay for it so people can see you did, but really, it's not all that special (I was going to compare it to a Prada bag, but hey, at least they are really good quality leather and they are frighteningly overpriced. Schools like SLAC are more like LV -- you pay too much, but not an insane amount and can't always be sure it's not a knock-off)

All kidding aside, how do we assess places like SLAC in a way that is fair to the good faculty and to the good students? If a campus tries to push a reputation as 'selective', then how do we integrate the results for those students who came in on waivers? There are many days when I'm not so sure I taught my students history. Most days, at least I'm sure I taught them something, even if it's a few new words or a better way to write a sentence or something that will be useful in the long run, but may not be on the course description. And if they aren't, they don't get assessed. Unfortunately, I can't teach the things I'm assessed on unless I teach them the tools to survive in a college class. It's exhausting.

And soon, I will also be assessed on how well I've managed to be a scholar on top of the teaching and service. I got one article (pedagogical) submitted at the beginning of the year. I somehow got elected to an office in a professional organization. I applied for a Dream Job (search suspended) and a postdoc. I'm behind on reviews, and I still have to write a conference paper, a scholarly article, and finish negotiating a contract for a project that is scholarly, but in the way of an aid, rather than something monograph-ish. And when I get that negotiated, I've got to finish it. And then I can work on another paper and the book. In between teaching those 13 hours (only 9 next semester), plus a summer course, and a new prep every semester for the foreseeable future. I'll let you know how that goes.

Still in Grading Jail

Still in Grading Jail

Anybody else?

And really, if you're done, just keep it to yourself, thanks!